Even though everything is moving in a perfection direction with my transition, and with my life in general right now, I’m still full of self doubts. I don’t mean doubts about the choices I’m making, I know I’m making all the right choices at the moment. I mean doubts about where these choices are going to leave me in the long run.
The largest of these doubts is whether I will ever settle down again, if somebody would ever fall in love with me again and if they’d look past the obvious. Although I’m still very optimistic, there’s a part of me that can’t deal with the thought of spending the rest of my life alone, on the basis of being transgender.
Due to not getting out as much as I once did, I registered on a dating site about a month ago. So far, I’ve been liked countless times and have had countless messages, none of which have really showed any real potential. I’m thinking about checking a couple of the other sites, none of them give me the option to list myself as transgender like the one I use does though.
Although I don’t broadcast being transgender, in a dating situation I think it’s important for that to be out there straight away, it saves time.
It would be nice to meet somebody away from the internet, but it’s not like I can spend hours in bars or local places each day, dating sites keep my options open.
Once I’ve been on HRT for a while I think dating will be less complicated, ever more so once I’ve had the bottom surgery. I can’t be angry at straight guys/gay women liking vagina and gay guys/straight women like penis, that’s how sexuality works. Unless I meet a bisexual individual, I can’t see finding somebody being easy until I’m all fixed.
Like I said though, I’m still optimistic and I think this year has a lot of good things planned for me, hopefully meeting the right person will be one of those good things. ♥