Yup, I went and borrowed a few words from a Maroon 5 song for the title of this post but it fits so it’s fine!
When I first started writing in this blog I wanted it to be a journal of sorts, somewhere I could write down my experiences and thoughts as well as having somewhere I could keep a little record of my transition.
Although I have kept my blog public since I first started writing here, I didn’t think it would actually attract any sort of attention but I’d hoped at least one person would find comfort in my writing, knowing others feel the same as you helps and I know that first hand.
The opposite of what I expected to happen has happened though, the blog started getting views and followers pretty much straight away which knocked me off track with how I was gonna post here. I wanted to be able to post both the positive AND negative experiences but instead I’ve stuck to the positives for the most part, which is why I’m posting less frequently recently.
I want to keep track of everything but I don’t want those who read my posts feeling “triggered” (it’s not a word I’d use) by some of the stuff I’d like to be posting about.
A lot more has changed than just my appearance and the name/pronouns (some/a lot of) people use for me though. Dating for instance.. That’s a whole new ball game since coming out as transgender and bisexual but I avoid talking about it in the blog even though it’s totally relevant. The largest part of my battle is my own anxiety constantly screaming at me each time I take a step forward, the social side of transitioning hasn’t been easy to say the least and I’ve still a bit to go.
I want to be able to see improvement in my life when I read my posts in the future and that’s not gonna happen if I’m avoiding certain things. If it’s even the smallest bit relevant I’m gonna post it from now on though, that puts the “journal” back on track for me and keeps things honest.
Anyway.. I don’t normally direct anything in my post at any likely readers/followers but being as people have contacted me on Twitter after reading my posts, and with the blog now having 1200+ views and double digit followers, I probably should eh?
Thanks for reading and following my journal, I really do hope some relevance and/or ease has been found in my posts as that’s the reason I leave them public. I’m looking forward to chatting with more of you in the future. ♥